Sunday, November 28, 2010

Soulful Celebrities @ Celebrity Club .

Well , what can I say .. Yesterday was absofrigginly awesome . Honestly I didn't expect it to be REALLY GOOD . In fact it was spectacular . Soulful Celebrities was held at Celebrity Club Solaris Mont Kiara , Soho KL starting 0930pm - 0100am .

Kudos to My brother Andi as I must say .. practically He managed everything by himself . Didn't think he could pull off a bloody good show like yesterday . I'm sure it wasn't easy for him to handle everything on his own .. Since he has a showcase which he also produced earlier .. That was @ Laundry Bar , Curve which sadly I didn't make it due to my show . That too , he worked alone .

As per yesterday . He gathered soulful singers & big names together like ; Fatin Syazana , Amirul Jafril , Sabhi Saddi & Andi A. Merican ( my brother himself ) .. had a complete set of 'talented' musicians and BVs , He got the venue sendiri , the promotions and printing all by himself jugak . With no help . Forked out his own benjamins . And just look at yesterday !! the crowd loved it !!

He planned everything . All the artistes , the place , musicians , promotions , designing .. And the banner was pretty ! plus the sales , The crowd .. Everything lah I must say ! Dah separuh jalan through out the show pun abang aku sebok jalan sana sini , berpeluh macam forest gump .. Entertaining guests and all . I'd say mamat ni bagus gila lah ( not that I always puji him ! ) I know he is bagus . But yesterday he was really bagus . as a matter of fact . he was more than bagus . He showed to everyone that despite whatever he's doing , all the business and etc .. He managed to not only talk the talk , he walks the walk too . Pulled off a great show . And it was a one man show .

A token of appreciation to : Fatin Syazana .. Girl !!! you've got soul ! , Amirul Jafril and the great sound ! .. Sabhi Saddi ( Boy ) + your move and groove ! And lastly hehe .. Abalong .. some awesome shit broooo !

So far semalam sangat mengasyikkan . Despite the soundman yang memang agak mengundang backslap dari ku .. other than that everything went well . KUDOS ! Memang semalam was a blast . The musicians + BVs memang bagus !! diorang betul2 'bagi' soul diorang ..
and they are called 'HARMONISME' .. and they're all single too . hahaha . BETUL LAH !
consist of 'Zharif , Shah Hans and Farhan !' wuhooo . dah macam gospel kat church pun ada diorang ni . tak percaya ? you wait for the next showcase and check them out Standing ovation okay !(:

Plus , feedback from the guests pun sangat memuaskan . Puas hati sangat .. Some of the people even said it's soooooo worth it for only rm35-50 . in fact sangat murah la kalau anda tengok show semalam . Cause yesterday's show is definitely worth more than that . Thanks to all who came !!!!!

One word to describe the event : Outstanding .
Adios (:

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Cheap Flower Delivery

A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send flowers for the occasion.

They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card.

It said "Rest in Peace".

The owner was angry and called the florist to complain. After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was,

The florist said:

"Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry you should imagine this: somewhere there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying 'Congratulations on your new location'."

How can I help you

(I work at the customer service desk at a grocery store . One day I had a guy come up and cash a winning lottery ticket for a dollar , and this is what then took place )

Me: There you go. Is there anything else I can help you with today?

Customer: Yeah, uhh I've got some dishes to be done, some windows to be washed, and a lawn to be mowed.

Me: *thinking he's joking* ha, yeah

Customer: *blank stare* are you gonna help me?

Me: still thinking he's joking* Ha, well, until **** opens up an At-Home division, I guess I can't help you out.

Customer: So you're not gonna help me?

Me: *realizing he's serious* no, sir. I can't just leave and go home with you to do chores.

Customer: You shouldn't be offering to do something if you don't plan on going through with it.

Me: I'm sorry, sir, but- ..

Customer: *interrupting* Next time, don't offer if you're not gonna do it! *storms off*

moral of the story is . Wow . how serious can a person be .

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

You've gotta love the Canadian Sense of Humor !

Westjet Flight Information .

West Jet is an Airline with head office situated in Calgary. West Jet airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight & safety lectures and announcements a bit more entertaining.

Here are several real examples that have been heard or reported by passengers from real flights:

On a West Jet flight. There is no assigned seating, you just sit where you want. Passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, People, people weare not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!

On another West Jet Flight with a very senior flight attendant crew, the pilot said, Ladies and gentlemen, we have reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants.

On landing, the stewardess said, Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you are going to leave anything, please make sure its something we would like to have.

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane.

Thank you for flying West Jet Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.

As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at the Vancouver airport, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: big fella. WHOA!

After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Ontario, a flight attendant on a West Jet flight announced, Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted.

From a West Jet Airlines employee: Welcome aboard West Jet Flight 245 to Calgary. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised.

In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling, stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite.

Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we will try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than West Jet Airlines.

Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments.

As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.

And from the pilot during his welcome message: West Jet Airlines is pleased to announce that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!

Heard on West Jet Airlines just after a very hard landing in Edmonton; The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, That was quite a bump, and I know what you all are thinking. I am here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault, it was the asphalt.

Overheard on a West Jet Airlines flight into Regina on a particularly windy and bumpy day: During the final approach, the Captain was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant said, Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Regina. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!

Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal.

An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the Passengers exited, smile, and give them a Thanks for flying our airline. He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question
Why, no, Maam, said the pilot. What is it?
The little old lady said, Did we land, or were we shot down?

After a real crusher of a landing in Halifax, the attendant came on with, Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Captain Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we will open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal.

Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of West Jet Airways.

Heard on a West Jet Airline flight. Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing. If you can light em, you can smoke em.

A plane was taking off from the Winnipeg airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from Winnipeg to Montreal. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax.. OH, MY GOD!
Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee on my lap. You should see the front of my pants! A passenger yelled: That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!

Monday, November 8, 2010

The Stupid Turkey .

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
"They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

The Eagle and The Rabbit .

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"

The eagle answered, "Sure , why not."

So the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

The Bird .

A little bird was flying south for the Winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.
As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.

The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Happiness exist

many people believe happiness is not real
people say you can reach it but you have to work for it
i believe happiness is here but you just dont know it
happiness cant be bought touched or owned
happiness is a rare commodity that can take a life time to realise
people can recieve happiness through another ones eyes
it's a state of peaceful bliss its a high that most people miss
i cant see it nor salvage it, i dont think it will come to me in an instance
but at least i can see hapiness in the distance

-Garfield Grimmett-

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Women , Men .. Adam & Eve .

Woman has Man in it;
Mrs. has Mr. in it;
Female has Male in it;
She has He in it;
Madam has Adam in it;
No wonder men always want to be inside women!
Men were born between the legs of a woman, yet men spend all their life and time trying to go back between the legs of a woman....
Why?
BECAUSE THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE HOME
Okay, Okay, it all makes sense now...
I never looked at it this way before:
Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN?
MEN tal illness
MEN strual cramps
MEN tal breakdown
MEN opause
GUY necologist
AND ..
When they have REAL trouble, it's a
HISterectomy.

Women are clever (:

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. God works in mysterious ways. After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers. The woman says, 'So, you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should be friends and live in peace for the rest of our days.'
Flattered, the man replies, 'Oh yes, I agree completely, this must be a sign from God! But you're still at fault...women shouldn't be allowed to drive..'
The woman continues, 'And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.'
She hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.
The woman takes the bottle, puts the cap back on and hands it back to the man.
The man asks, 'Aren't you having any?'
The woman replies, 'No. I think I'll just wait for the police...'

MORAL OF THE STORY:
Women are clever.
Don't mess with them..